Taking control…


Life throws us many curve balls — and sometimes we get hit in the face by every single one of them. We insist life is out to get us and make us absolutely horrible, but in actuality, it is trying to help us to learn to adapt and become better players. We may not be able to control the curve balls in our life, but we can control how we react to them. It’s a learning process, though. You cannot expect to become amazing at it over night, but there will come a day (at least once) when life presents you a curve ball and you will be able to hit it out of the park.

Currently, I am trying to master the weight loss curve ball. This is one thing I really want to succeed at. Every day I feel a little stronger, a little more energetic, and a little more confident. Already I feel like I take up a little less space in the world and no longer fill up a room quite as much. It was one of the reasons I really hated going into crowds because I just kept thinking “Wow, I am the fat girl making it feel so crowded in here.” Yes, my self esteem was pretty much rock bottom, but I am slowly picking that back up. I was (still am on occasion) really hard on myself for letting my weight get so out of control.  Yet for a long time, instead of taking control, I continued to sit in the back sit of a car without a driver. (Wow, I am using a lot of analogies already. Is anyone confused yet?).

I lived my life in constant fear. Fear I was not going to fit into a chair (or worse, break it), fear I was going to get diabetes or other diseases brought on by obesity, fear of not being accepted by peers… just constant fear. I was missing out on so much in my life due to my weight. I am only 22 years old, and I was living my life like I was way passed my prime, and it was gnawing away at my soul. I needed to change, but I could not expect other people to make the change for me. There is no magic cure for this. I had to be strong enough to say “no” to temptations and kind enough to myself to say “yes” to health.

So far, I have had a few setbacks but nothing too drastic (knock on wood). Nothing changes the fact that I have lost 36 pounds. I will reach my goal because I am in control. Things are going to happen all the time and as much as I wish they did not, I cannot stop it but I can control how I react to it. Life goes much more smoother when you just go with the flow of things instead of constantly fighting the current.

What’s something today that you can take control of? Is there anything you have been putting to the side hoping that someone else will take care of it?


5 thoughts on “Taking control…

  1. I’m trying hard to find a job during these tough times, but exercising and eating well is keeping me grounded for the most part. Sometimes it gets very hard and depressing, but I keep going. I lost part of my support system and it still hurts me, but I’m trying the negative and turn it into something positive. Thanks for the great post. Healthy Journey!

    • That is really hard… I am really lucky to have a great support team right now, but there are a lot out side forces that could make it really easy to lose sight of things.. I know as long as you focus on the positive and just portray confidence in your resume… you will definitely find a job! I know it. =) I am sorry you lost a part of your support system… I took a really hard blow when my dad passed away… but it motivated me too. If you ever need to vent, I am here for you!!

      • Thanks, Cassy. I didn’t have a support team when I lost the first 80. If I would have waited for them to show up then I’m pretty sure I would not have made the progress I have made now. My support system was a person I thought was a friend and he broke my heart. I’m getting stronger, but it still hurts. Just another obstacle to deal with. I’m getting stronger. Thank you for being supportive. 🙂

      • That’s super impressive! You are sooo strong! I don’t know if I could have made it this far without at least one person believing in me… because at the beginning of this journey, I definitely didn’t think I could. I needed someone routing me on as I accomplished my first jog around the block! But I am sorry to hear about that friend… that is hard…but I am glad you are being strong about it! That’s awesome! =)

  2. Taking control of your own destiny is so important. I can relate to feeling like a backseat driver in my own life. I really had a breakthrough on that part of my journey about 4 years ago and it’s made a huge difference. Not that it hasn’t been a roller coaster ride at times, but just realizing that I’m the only one who can make a change for ME…that was empowering…and a lot of responsibility. You are doing awesome. 36 pounds is amazing. I keep getting stuck on the first 5!

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