Sometimes I Lose Direction…


I hate this point where I am stuck in the moment of waiting. It makes me feel antsy and slightly out of control. Right now, I am waiting for my doctor’s appointment at 3:30 this afternoon to see what is wrong with my foot. Also on the forefront of my mind is waiting for my surgery to be done and over with. I feel like I am just stuck in this moment of in-between and it is really driving me crazy. This weekend we had plans to go hiking, and I was really pumped for it… but unfortunately my body had other plans. I spent the majority of my weekend, lying on the couch and eating bad food. You heard me. I ate a lot of bad food this weekend because I felt directionless. My husband was sick with a cold, and I am gimpy… and I just had no idea what to do with myself. I was pumped for hiking but knew my foot wouldn’t handle it. And I have become one of those people who do not like to stay still for very long. I like doing things! Just last year, I would have had no problem ordering out food and chowing down all day and night… but now, I don’t like it. So I am feeling very unaccomplished right now.

I am getting back to being serious about getting healthy and losing weight. I have been very lax lately with my alcohol consumption and what not. So I am not going to have any alcohol until my Birthday (about 2 weeks away). When I first started on this journey, I went months without alcohol so I think I should manage with 2 weeks. Also, Trying Not to be Fat is doing a Salad-A-Day challenge which I think is an awesome idea! So I am starting that today and doing that also for a whole entire week. Actually, I am planning on having smoothies for breakfast, salads for lunch, and then doing a nice balanced dinner. For one week. No alcohol (I feel like I need to keep saying this so I remember).  I am hoping I have just bruised something in my foot and it will go away quickly. I really would like to do some active things this coming weekend.

Also, I keep giving myself excuses to eat things, especially with my impending jaw surgery (eat this now because for 6 weeks you won’t be able to eat it). Which is a really bad excuse. I am on this journey for the long haul so I shouldn’t start shoving a bunch of crap into my mouth just because for 6 weeks I don’t even have the option to eat it. I have gone all this time without really eating it, so I don’t see why another 6 weeks would kill me. So as of today, I am no longer using that surgery as an excuse.

This weekend wasn’t entirely horrible, though. We did manage to help a friend capture a kitten (she caught 2 on her own, and then we brought our cat whisperer friend over and we got the last kitten of the bunch!). Absolutely adorable.

Very skittish at first but settled down very quickly and became a little lover!

With resting for most of the weekend, I decided to experiment for the first time ever with my nail polish. I am not one for creativity so this is a huge step for me, so don’t laugh, ok?


Yay Polka Dots!

I also got to watch a lot of Battlestar Galactica and The Big Bang Theory so I got my nerd on… so that’s always nice. I just need to learn to watch my eating so I don’t feel so gross when I am not doing as much activity. I also need to remember that it is okay to rest when you are injured. I am not a failure. This is just a small little back step.

Oh! And I have decided on a theme for my birthday party! That’s right. I am doing the Evil Mastermind Party Idea! It’s going to be so much fun! I will let you know more of my evil plannings throughout the week! I also need to post the curry recipe. Don’t let me forget!

Now off to gimp around the grocery store! Get me some salad stuff.




7 thoughts on “Sometimes I Lose Direction…

  1. Ride the Amigo at the grocery store. LOL. I actually hate when I see so many people on those who shouldn’t be using them. Someone’s grandma may need it!

    Good luck with Salad A Day, and no booze! Also with making through this horrible waiting period. Waiting is the worst!!

    • Hahaha! I would feel bad because with my luck I would take the last one and then spy Grandma with her oxygen tank, hobbling around…. haha

      And thanks! I definitely need it but I am feeling a lot more motivated again!

  2. Oh Cassy, it’s okay… we all have our rough days… I hope everything gets better for you soon because you seem to be having a rough time of it. I wish nothing but the best for you, my friend 🙂

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